I work for the European office of a large US BigTech company. Recently got a new manager based in New York, and within weeks I was told I’m showing a “lack of commitment” because I log off at 5:00pm.
Apparently, my Slack going quiet after 5 is “concerning.” Not responding to emails sent late at night is “not being available.” Declining meetings scheduled for my evening is “not being a team player.”
This genuinely surprised me. Where I live, working hours are… working hours. If someone regularly needs evenings and weekends to keep things moving, the assumption isn’t heroism—it’s that something is broken: planning, staffing, or expectations. Staying late to prove you care isn’t admired; it’s usually seen as poor boundaries or bad management.
My manager framed this as “going the extra mile” and said that if I want to grow, I need to be more flexible with my time. From my perspective, that sounds less like flexibility and more like an expectation that Europe should quietly align its life around US time zones.
So I’m honestly curious (and maybe a little confused): Is this actually normal in American tech culture? Is commitment measured by visible availability rather than results? Is staying late a signal of ambition, even if nothing is actively on fire?
From this side of the Atlantic, the idea that leaving on time is suspicious, and that having a life outside of work needs to be justified, feels pretty alien.
Would love to hear if this is just one manager, or if this is simply how things work in the US.
We have IC's scattered all over Europe and we know that their day is their day. They start early and they end when they end. They have lives. Some companies don't understand that. And some managers are idiots; but I suppose they have bosses too. Honestly, me simply saying that you have a bad manager is depressing to me, and unhelpful for you. But, that seems the crux of the matter. It'd be funny to ask for a meeting at 5AM EST, just as you hit mid-morning. But, that probably won't end well.
You're probably going to have a convo with the manager, and as diplomatically as possible, establish some ground rules. My advice, knowing nothing, is to stay away from the blast that might occur when a boss gets bossy.
FWIW, when I read this exact story on reddit a few days ago, that poster sent the email thread to HR, HR read the US-based manager the riot act, and it was never mentioned again.