What was your first big realization after your first exp living alone?

quiet

The freedom.

Not having to compromise in order to accommodate others. Enjoyed many years of living life on my terms. Sure I had to go to work, but in my free time I could do whatever I wanted, when it suited me and be with those whom I choose to enjoy their company for as long as I felt like it.

I used used to walk to a particular park bench between two trees in the Meadows in Edinburgh when I first lived alone. I never thought about why. My son now lives alone and goes for walks. I imagine there is something about the movement and familiarity which makes a day more interesting.

Feeding yourself requires a whole set of logistics that no one prepared me for. Eating cheap and healthy twice or three times a day requires a bit of planning, shopping and cooking skills. It's something you have to keep doing regardless of how late you come home and how tired you are.

A few years later after a move abroad: Stoßlüften!

Honestly, I guess the difference between how much food a whole family goes through and the amount that one or two people go through. When buying for your family or for roommates, a standard bottle of milk or loaf of bread will be gone in under a week. On your own? You might get through half of that if lucky, with plenty left over going to waste.

So you have to really reconsider how much you'll be able to eat/drink before it expires, and often buy way smaller portions than you would if shopping for others.

How freedom and isolation go hand in hand.

Parents keeping the details of household bills from me enabled them to castigate about pretty much anything, from leaving a light on for more than a few minutes, to suggesting I had worms because of the amount of food I ate and I was far from obese.

Once forced to move out in my twenties, I found it wasnt that expensive, I could eat well, do things and the anxiety I had with not being able to pay bills was unfounded.

I think businesses could help youngsters gain their independence by just being more upfront over the costs they are likely to see, if they move into a property, etc etc.

With hindsight I should have moved out earlier because the parents did get alot of unpaid help from me by me still living at home, which is part of that one way older generational exploitation thats normalised in society.

That not all door knobs unlock (like schlage does) when you open them from the inside...

Not really a big realization, but the biggest I had. Luckily enough it was the first day and the RA just finished having orientation in the lobby.

Having a washer/dryer in unit is really nice

How much I love it. And I mean _alone_ alone. Not with roommates, or a boyfriend. By myself. I feel a special sort of peace that comes with the quiet privacy of being in my own home.