It seems that I am stuck in a vicious circle where my work woes keep me from being my best in the personal life (exercise, spending quality time with family, sleep) and resulting issues in physical and mental ealth means I slip up more at work and the cycle repeats.
Wondering what are some goto behaviors/tactics I might be lacking to make it work.
Second, slow down on work related projects and activities. Sometimes I just stop thinking about or working on programming related side projects for a week or so to cleanse the palette.
- If your work woes are caused by an anxiety to perform and think you're doing well at work, chances are in most cases other people will think so too. In general, people will think less about you than you're paranoid about.
- If you're anxious that "bad thing X will happen unless I do A, B and C", then write down your worries of what the consequences (Y) will be if you don't do A, B and C. Then, selectively avoid completing certain tasks, or let them run late. I'm not talking about core work tasks here, use your own judgement. Why do this? Well, you want to be able to revisit this list later and see if the consequences were as you predicted. Chances are for a lot of things no one will care. Then you're building up a base of evidence that your more neurotic tendencies aren't the best predictor of the future, and you can adjust accordingly. Sometimes this base of hard evidence is needed for certain personalities to really internalise the lessons.
I find "sticking to the process" to be most important characteristic in increasing capabilities.
The gym analogy is appropriate here. If I stop working out because I can't manage a particular weight, then I become weaker overtime (or stagnate at best). But if I persist despite the initial pressures, even if imperfectly, then eventually I become capable of handling the extra weight.
Man needs an arena to struggle, to overcome; without that a human being cannot fully develop oneself.