Here are some ideas I came up with, but none seem to work when I play them through to the end:
- Industry: I know that if I work hard and smart enough, I will eventually find a project that is interesting, but you can't really call that the same as self studying - I'll always be guided by business needs, I'll inherently gravitate towards certain solutions instead of others, so I lose out on really investing myself into random endeavors.
- Startups: Nope
- Working on the side: I'll probably just get burned out from overworking on two different projects at once
- slacking off: This might actually be viable, but I don't know if this is the move for my personal developemnt lmao
- Grad School: To be honest, even for grad classes I feel bored out of my mind, I don't think lecture formats suit me. But on the other hand, I don't really have a desire to create new knowledge anyways, so I don't think I'd succeed in a PhD (assuming I can even get in lol)
Hopefully the post at least got the feeling across of what's currently going in my head. Given that, what would your advice be for me? Does anybody else feel the same way? What did you do?
I pretty much agree with your conclusions from working through different scenarios.
Take a good look at the "esoteric" topics that interest you. Is there a common thread, e.g. bio-engineering? Think back at when you were young, what did you enjoy doing the most? What were your hobbies? When you step back and look at such questions and your answers you will see a common theme. That is the gist of the idea for where to direct your interests. Then based on those interests you will identify the area in which you might enjoy working.
Over time your interests will change and it is perfectly Ok to change careers as you go along.
If none of that jells, then consider taking a year off to work as a builders' laborer. The fresh air and physical work will clear your mind far better than sitting in some grad course lecture.