Completely breakdown and obliterate the argument of “it is what is”?

"It is what it is" is not an argument. There is nothing to break down or 'obliterate'. It's an admission and acknowledgement that there is nothing that can or could be feasibly done to improve the situation.

Example: "My father's gambling addiction made life growing up much harder, but I managed to come up okay. It is what it is".

Here, they are stating that as a small child growing up in a home with an gambling addict father life was made more difficult, but there is not much that they as a small child could do to rectify their situation. It's not an argument, it's a statement of fact.

If something is a certain way, it might seem insurmountable to change at first glance, but with determination and strong will, it could be changed for the better.

Not your personal life coach - especially when you can't be bothered to even write up some context that might explain the idea to people who are not already familiar with it.

What?