HACKER Q&A
📣 jonathan_h

How do you add structure to your life?


General tips and info are welcome so that this question helps others! --- But also, specific advice to my situation is extra helpful as I'm a bit lost in life:

I'm in a situation where I intentionally work 3 days/19 hours a week to make room for personal growth. The job pays just enough to cover my bills, rent, leisure/entertainment, etc. -- I have very few obligations otherwise.

The idea was to use the free time to accomplish personal goals, ordered roughly by priority:

Lose weight, upskill for a new field of work (software dev), make more friends, dabble in some new hobbies, try dating, etc.

However, I haven't made meaningful progress on these goals, and these past few months in particular I'm doubting my ability to break-down these goals into smaller steps and then hold myself accountable to those steps, and now it's beginning to make me depressed. I'm worried that I've given myself too much free time.

I suppose I could return to full-time work, but (1) I might feel more useful short-term, but unsure I'd be much happier long-term. (2) I'd like to become more of a self-starter.

I know I can do it as I've accomplished some pretty good goals in the past, but I'm having trouble building momentum / creating habits that support my goals.

(Note: I know therapy [and perhaps medication] is likely an important step in resolving my situation, and I'm going to seek this out starting January once my new insurance plan kicks in. Feel free to ask for more info if you think that would help!)


  👤 night-rider Accepted Answer ✓
If you want to move mountains, start by picking up small stones. Start small, then build momentum. Suffer the pain of discipline or the pain of regret. Most self-help is about the Big Win, so start small. Baby steps. Then make discipline as natural as breathing.