HACKER Q&A
📣 mib32

How do you deal with running errands guilt?


I work a 40 hour week, usually from 10 to 6.

It's so happened, that most of businesses surrounding me are also only open during exactly same time.

I am a human, and I need to go to doctors, therapists, other time I need to visit some place to let's say choose some furniture to buy, or just to drink a cup of coffee in a lunch time on a terrace of a cafe. I am human, and I feel I am becoming less human if I don't allow myself such things!

The problem is that I don't understand how to talk about that with my employer. Usually when I need to get out, I just put the "afk" status on slack and go.

What happens after: if I had no slack mentions, and nothing happened, I feel okay, as if my "bad move" went unnoticed. But if I see some unviewed mentions, somebody was pinging me, I immediately feel lots of shame and guilt. My reaction is: "I'm here now, let's work work work! I am sorry I was absent people!" It feels really bad and weird.

HN, did you also ever feel like this? What strategies you found useful?


  👤 BergTheBold Accepted Answer ✓
Just get your job done and make sure your coworkers know when you'll be gone and when you'll be back. You're right - you're human and need to get things done that aren't your job. Maybe, like, just don't feel bad. Your boss doesn't feel bad for preventing you from living the rest of your life outside of work. My second thought on this - this sounds a little bit like humble bragging. "I don't have time to get my basic chores done because I have such a good work ethic". Is this really because you're too squeamish about being assertive? Just be matter-of-fact about it. Tell your manager that you have something you need to get done, the day and times you'll be gone, and then you've done your part.

👤 schwartzworld
You've almost certainly never had a job that paid what your labor was actually worth. Most would replace you with a computer program the second they they could. Don't feel bad about stealing an hour of time to get your teeth cleaned.

👤 intronextron
Oh I feel just like this and have no way to change it. It's odd how much this sucks.