I am beginning to feel that regardless of modern innovations when push comes to shove...the truth is homesteading requires an almost soul crushing amount of hard work and fortitude for very small gains.
I can't help feel frustrated when I watch my friends in the city enjoy all of the comforts it offers and seemingly pull away from me both financially and socially.
So I am looking for either some hard truths or encouragement regarding this matter.
Please be honest and refrain from judging those who are! I am a big boy and can handle the truth.
Thank You
Farmlife is hard as hell and successful farms find ways of leveraging what they grow into hired cheap labor and other efficiencies that takes much of the burden off of the owners. In the case of the popular homesteaders, they don't like to show this much as it takes away from the idyllic lifestyle they are literally making money pushing -- where tilling a field, cutting back brush, or fixing a field drain are 10 second activity clips.
If you want to farm, just go farm, but the homesteading trend in my opinion has smells of a kind of grassroots pyramid scheme where the only way to be successful at it is to bring other people into it.
Anyway, just keeping what land is not rented out and the buildings from degrading is nigh on a full-time job in itself; trenches need to be dug and maintained, forest kept at bay, houses painted, roofs mended &c.
I've much respect for anyone who decides to give it a go, but I believe your assessment is correct: It is an awful lot of work for little gain but subsistence, not leaving much time or money for other pastimes.
A couple of hundred years ago, the alternative to this back-breaking work might have been starving or succumbing to the elements.
Today, the alternative is just about any paid job, outsourcing all the backbreaking work to other, larger, more efficient units.
For most people, the choice is simple; for other, more adventurous people, trying out the lifestyle is tempting enough to actually go ahead and do it.
You've gone ahead and done it, found it not to be all it was cranked up to be.
Unless you find (or think you will eventually find) comfort and fulfillment in the work in its own right, I'd say cut your losses, find employment somewhere and try to use the lessons learned while homesteading to your advantage in phase II of your career in the big city.
For example, if you did it due to an ingrained sense of moral responsibility, your current feelings may be temporary and you’ll get through them if you stick to it or hang out with different friends which align closer to your values.
If you did it because it looked like a fun challenge but ended up being more than you can take, the solution may be to abandon the experiment.
Perhaps it’s a mix of both, in which case maybe you can cut back without doing a complete reversal or hire someone to help with the hardest parts.
You mentioned YouTube and Amazon, but not local people in similar situations. Is there no one geographically close to you, a neighbour with a similar setup, you could talk to?
My first two years were full of buyer's remorse. I didn't enjoy it nearly as much as I had expected, the work was very hard, I felt incompetent, I missed my friends back in the metropolitan area, and I missed out on a lot of the food choices.
...but the buyer's remorse passed. Partially this was my preferences changing, partially it was making new friends, partially it was hiring on help to do some tasks (farmhands to install fencing and clear an overgrown pasture, etc.), partially it was acquiring the skills and equipment that made work easier, and finally it was cutting back on the task list.
I'd be happy to share more thoughts if you want to go into more details on your thinking.
Now, do I enjoy nature and want to live away from the city? Yes, yes I do, but I don’t need to homestead to do that.
It's the difference between one layman person spending an hour to bake a single bread by hand on a wood stove, and ten persons each operating a part of a machine in a factory that spits out 8000 breads per 8-hour shift.
You can try to replicate factory-style production in your homestead somewhat and get decent productivity numbers. But you'd need to do this for bread, and cheese, and clothes. You simply can't specialise nor get the right scale nor make the necessary capital expenditures across multiple product categories for that to work.
Homesteading thereby really means accepting that your productivity is a small fraction of that of modern life.
Of course you can trade and obtain most of the things you don't produce like any other person on the planet. But what you're trading in the end is your time, and its value is measured in productivity. If you sell an hour of your time but only produce 1 loaf of bread, and you're competing in a marketplace with agents whose productivity is 100 loafs of bread, your purchasing power is very weak, and the prices of everything measured against your own labour-time will be exorbitant.
Of course you can also say you don't homestead but instead simply live in a rural area, in isolation, working a modern remote job (e.g. in tech). That'd work fine, but it's probably not defined as homesteading. But it's a modus that probably works better for you: enjoy the closeness to nature, enjoy agricultural activities as much as you enjoy it as a hobby, live relatively simply and without many expenses and luxuries, and work only a few hours in tech to sustain this cheaper lifestyle.
Cities work great for many people, there’s no denying that. The main question should be what works for you, rather than anything else.
I would offer you three take-aways from this experience: First, it is an incredible amount of work. I didn't, and don't, mind that, since the work I do on the farm is 95% recreation for me. Doing it with and for my family has been fulfilling and satisfying. But I did not come to this life from an urban life, nor from a one rich in pure leisure time or activity. I grew up on a primitive (for the time) farm/ranch, and did not want to leave that life. I am also an intensely introverted personality. It has been much harder for my wife, who did come to it from an urban existence. In most ways she has thrived, but she would not recommend the life to her own children, or to others.
Second, you can homestead and be engaged in an outside, even highly demanding, technical career. But those are absolutely the only two things you'll do with your life and time if you expect to do both at all well.
Third, it takes a team. I could not have done it by myself.
I don't much like living in cities, but homesteading is a bit of an extreme reaction to it. What brings me tranquility is the ability to be among nature, to be able to talk to my neighbours and get to know them in a friendly way, then come home to most mod cons, and do what I'm reasonably good at - work a tech job - remotely, in comfort. Every now and again I need to go into the city to the office, but those occasional office days become fun, and I can often combine them with going shopping or seeing some entertainment.
If I feel like it I can go get a taste of some 'self reliance' DIY work, but I'm not ultimately required to do it - I can just get someone in and pay them to do the work.
What was it that attracted you to homesteading exactly?
The prosperous homesteaders on YouTube make their money off of YouTube.
I would view a comfortable life in the country as a luxury. You finance the luxury with a lucrative, specialized job/business that only takes a small portion of your time.
George W. Bush famously liked to spend time on his ranch with a chainsaw clearing brush. Clearing brush, like blacksmithing, woodworking, fly fishing or homesteading, can be a fun way to spend time. But generally these are luxuries that have to be financed with work. Bush could not have survived by trading in his job or business for clearing brush.
Unless you have:
A) an existing land base big enough to support you (in my area, that might be 500+ acres) and the knowledge and equipment to farm it,
B) a niche market for a rare farm product that you can charge exorbitant prices for, or
C) preexisting wealth (which can maybe get you item A),
you're not going to get ahead financially by homesteading. The business model just doesn't pencil out. Doubly so for any sort of animal agriculture. The market (both inputs and outputs) is driven by commercial farms, and you're trying to compete with that market from a wildly disadvantaged starting position.
Homesteaders I know also tend to be rather unfocused in their plans. They want to grow 15 different kinds of food, build everything they need from scratch, learn how to do a dozen different jobs, and take care of all the various maintenance around it all. That's fun when it's a hobby, but exhausting when you're trying to make a living off of it. And ultimately the work you're doing for yourself and the money your saving are usually the equivalent of minimum-wage-type jobs; having a basement full of home-canned garden produce is a point of pride, but it's not like the price of grocery store frozen peas was making up a significant fraction of your monthly spending beforehand.
You mention friends pulling away financially and socially. Speaking to finances, "Keeping up with the Joneses" is hard to do if you're measuring yourself against a peer group that has not much in common any longer. Socially, it would depend on your group of friends. If you just no longer have time for them, then that's a question of "how much do I value this change in lifestyle versus valuing the friendships I'm going to lose?"
Growing up I lived in a small farming community. My parents had essentially a hobby farm, but we were surrounded mostly by large-scale farmers and the occasional farm that would probably qualify as part of the "homestead" movement these days.
It is hard work and not something I would ever seek to do for myself.
BUT: The one thing I found growing up in that community is that for a specific type of personality, that kind of hard work is its own reward. Patching up fences, being able to "create" a thing (even if it's just growing plants), it's a different kind of reward that for some people seems like plenty.
I think if you find that reward offsets the work you're doing, and you generally find your life to be better for you than before, then I think you made the right choice.
I would also say, the stresses of living on a farm are markedly different than job stresses. Being physically tired at the end of the day but having the mental energy (or hunger at points) to sit down and burn through a good book or documentary is something I actually miss quite a bit.
At the end of the day, if you tried it out and don't like it it's not a failure. You've no doubt learned a lot of valuable skills and those can be handy in unexpected places.
NFI about "homesteading" but I've lived out in the woods for a very long time, which has had tradeoffs and difficulties. For me "city life" was like wearing an inside out pincushion suit the whole time; irritations everywhere that never went away. Out here I can calm down and pay attention to things and be something other than a hyper-reactive rage monster all the time.
That's worth more than any of the inducements available in other lifestyles, to me.
The main thing people on the internet leave off is that you have to a) be okay with isolation/alone time, and b) you will work every day of your life.
We set out to make a plot that is as self-sufficient as possible (internet, water, and about 1/4 of our electricity come from the grid still, all other inputs are from our land). It took most of the two decades to get to a point where we can breathe. That doesn't mean 'not work' that means that we aren't doing backbreaking labor as much anymore.
It's the call of the pastoral. People have such rose-tinted glasses about the past and how people lived then. It was hard, dirty, and short.
If you don't find pleasure in the work itself, for the sake of itself, maybe consider a change. That doesn't make you a failure, it makes you practical. Learning is part of it. I learned that I like working with my hands more than I like working in an office. I also learned that it doesn't pay the bills.
If you're different, you're different. So what?
That being said, if it's just the social aspect, find people around you to do things with. We share labor with our neighbors. It's nice because it provides much needed help with the work, and it provides a social aspect. But one thing that holds true, is that, if you are in a really rural area, people tend toward being alone. That's why they live there.
The garden has fared a little better. I’ve lost crops to squash borers and bad blight. I’ve gotten a few things off of it. But not nearly what I’ve spent in dirt, amendments, plants etc.
What I’ve decided is that there is an economy of scale to these things. For all its flaws, factory farming is efficient. Just like factories cranking out widgets are more efficient than a guy carving widgets by hand one by one.
It may be that after several years I get more efficient. Im trying more from seed and seeing what amendments work. But for me, I now garden for fun. I enjoy digging in the dirt and growing things I can eat. It’s a hobby and not something I think makes sense for financial or even environmental reasons.
Another thing the socials leave out is how damn isolating it is. You're alone buddy. like ALONE ALONE. ever wonder why you see folks stopped on gravel roads chatting for 2 hours? Because they haven't seen another human for a few days or even weeks. Again, living in the country isn't for everyone, and especially hard on people that didn't grow up around that environment or have a skill that helps out here(carpenter, mechanic, etc)
Homesteading and living in the country isn't about following someone else's way. It's about finding your own. Maybe living 20 miles down a gravel road, only using solar panels to heat your tent isn't for you. Maybe living a little outside the burbs, with 2-5 acres and a big garden is your jam.
> the comforts it offers and seemingly pull away from me both financially and
> socially
If you don't find total value greater than your total losses in the situation, the solution is evident. Make a list, do the math. Revisit it periodically.
* https://thedecisionlab.com/biases/the-sunk-cost-fallacy/
* https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sunk_cost
Decide whether you're getting any kind of "value" from what you're doing, and take a direction from there. What's done is done, and it shouldn't have any bearing on what to do next.
"requires an almost soul crushing amount of hard work"
I consider the work I do, coding for a large organization, to be soul crushing.
It's all about what you want and your perspective. If you want social status, money, and city life, then it sounds like you've already figured out that homesteading is not for you.
However overall, it seems like your current situation is not meeting your expectations financially and socially. If you write down what you expected and what you got, maybe you can see where your assumptions were invalid and can decide to adjust your plan from there.
Perhaps it's too late for you, but this is my plan, and maybe this will give you some ideas is
- Continue working my regular job remotely (money stability, not going all in, can use money to deal with problems on the homestead side)
- Plant fruit trees (low maintenance, high yield once they are established | fruit/lemons)
- Have chickens and maybe rabbits (low maintenance, have to feed them and that's mostly it | eggs/meat)
- Bees (low maintenance | honey)
- Plant a garden during spring with things I like
In essence I think that going full time self-sufficient farmer is a cool sounding idea, but that's not what I want to be dedicating my time on. I rather be less dependent on others, but knowing that I won't be mining for iron to make my own tools.
So my suggestion would be, pull back a bit, it's obvious you are not enjoying it. Find a job you like that is remote. Remove high maintenance things, focus on low maintenance or enjoyable homesteading things. Then you can add something "harder" once you are used to the current workload. Or make enough money to hire someone to do the things you hate...
We'd still go to the grocery store 1/mo to get toilet paper, etc. We still had commercial power, cars, full time tech jobs, a mortgate, some form of internet....not sure it qualifies as homesteading, but it was my time on a farm.
Yes it's a lot of work, I'd get up at 5:30 to milk the goats, and again at 6pm I'd have to be home to milk. Barns are constant work in the quiet time, and the "garden" uses up all other time in spring through fall. We didn't take a vacation for ~4 years, and then found someone who would help care for the farm and finally got a break.
All the while we worked tech job, me at a 6 person company. The experience was pretty amazing....so I don't regret that. The pay was horrible, even by standards back then. And my opportunities even worse, I was hours from Chicago so could not commute. And there was nothing else nearby, so I was hand cuffed to that job. When 2009 came by and the job ended as the economy tanked we sold the farm and moved to somewhere with a choice of jobs.
Why did we go to the farm? In our 20s we saw it was a chance to buy a house, land, and see how feed really grows. In this case we succeeded.
But the opportunity cost was huge, we could have taken jobs at the to-be FANGs back in the bay area we left. We could have paid that outrageous some of 500k or 600k for a house in Sunnyvale. We could have spent 6 years in our late 20s or 30s earning 3-4x the salary and having it grow, etc.
But hindsight is 20/20. Who would have expected the FANGs to be so successful after the .com bubble burst? Houses in the South Bay to appreciate so much? Well a lot of people by not me. ;)
Was it a mistake? I dunno.
I'd recommend a middle path. Homestead, but adopt some modern conveniences where it makes your life comfortable. Reject the things that would just lead to more difficulty, expense, complication. Then disconnect from your friends for a while and see if you don't start to feel good about your life again.
Personally, the more I'm out in nature and just comfortable enough, the more I think everyone else is crazy for living in cities. It's really beautiful and quiet and interesting out here. And I really appreciate every little advantage I have. Just being able to lie in my bed, snug and cozy, with a glass of wine, some mushroom risotto, a movie on the laptop, and the whole world outside just quiet and blanketed in pristine snow ... How could anyone ask for more?
It reminds me of the Amish / Pennsylvania Dutch for example. So much of their relationships are built around community, asking for help, and relying on your neighbor.
It provides purpose, support, and makes otherwise impossible things easy (e.g. barn-raising.)
You can live rurally and not “homestead” in the sense that you can import many (not all) of the conveniences that city dwellers have.
Perhaps some of the work you find most soul crushing can be outsourced or mechanized.
Do you find any of the positives that you expected when setting out, or did those turn out to be mirages?
I think the keyword here is "comforts". If we are honest in our world today, it is comfort and convenience that, while we crave them, are, for the most part, causing us grief in terms of environmental, political, cultural and economic impact. So while I understand your reticence and reluctance to forge onward, I do applaud your willingness to journey down this path in the first place.
To my mind, this is an opportunity to re-calibrate your system of values in such a way that homesteading becomes a way to reintegrate yourself with the natural world without trying to dominate it. In doing so, you need not necessarily adhere to an ascetic approach to homesteading, but work to achieve a balanced and fulfilling approach.
You say your friends are moving from you financially and socially. Did you move to the country for financial and social gain?
Or did you move to gain greater control of your life, be in nature, grow your own food - ie live a more human and less constrained existence?
I have a lot of respect for people that do homesteading, but it requires making hard decisions if you involve animals.
I was gardening as well, and I love the hands in soil. However, it is back-breaking work for marginal gains.
The only thing I do recommend is finding a balance between what you desire in life versus what others are doing. Comparison is really the thief of joy. If you can find meaning in the labor, then it is great. As hard as it was to take care of two sick goats for years, it was meaningful.
If yes, I think it was a mistake.
For me homesteading would be a way of escaping the rat race and doing something meaningful. I wouldn't expect to get much money out of it nor any social standing.
The farm was amazing: hundreds of well cared-for cows, sheep, and goats. An education program that brought kids around. Rolling hills and a vegetable garden we could not harvest fast enough. A stream we could swim in just outside the backyard.
Working there was hell. Twelve hour days, low pay, no benefits, always covered in shit, piss, blood and every other excrement imaginable. The farm staff turned over every two years, as young people chased the romance of farm work and then spun off, back to a job and a city.
A few of the workers I keep tabs on actually went off to start their own farms. But each of them has a partner with a real job and steady income.
If you expected to do homesteading stuff for a couple years and then 'retire' in some garden of eden, I suspect you are realizing that will never be the case. The homesteading life (or at least why I chose it myself) is about personal fulfillment in managing the land and animals, the DIY and semi-self-sustainable aspect of it and the freedom that comes with privacy and your own space.
Becoming truly self-sustaining and self-sufficient is incredibly difficult these days. Good luck to you.
You’ve started to discover a kind of truth. It’s just not the truth you wanted to find. Which is part of what makes truth—deep emotional truth—annoying, and part of why so many of us avoid it as much as we can.
Authors you might want to read here on coming to terms with toil and place and work absolutely include Wendell Berry, who has basically made this his life's work.
You nailed it it is a crap load of hard work. It is soul crushing trying to save a newborn calf and having it die in your arms. Have had it happen numerous times and it does not get any easier. Have seen hundreds of acres of crops destroyed in 30 seconds from a weather event. Stress is real and it sucks.
I miss hard work. The need to go outside and get things done. My teenage self never would’ve thought I’d be 30 missing old rural Virginia and free lands, while sleeping in an overpriced brick enclosure near DC.
I'll add this: you could have posted the same comment (minus "in the city") were you living along side them. It's easy to cherry pick your successful friends and compare yourself to them, regardless of your current situation in life.
I would instead compare yourself today to yourself ... 5 years ago. Then consider where you want to be 5 years hence.
And I don't think it will help you survive in a collapse. Here's a piece from 2004 that I mirrored on my own website, Urban vs Rural Sustainability by Toby Hemenway: http://ranprieur.com/readings/urbanrural.html
I would advise cutting back and building up slowly. Stay on-grid (if possible), buy as much food from the grocery store as needed, keep your job (if possible). Then, if things get easier, slowly ramp up your self-sufficiency.
(1) is for you to judge. If you find the amount of work is not rewarding, then you are the source of truth on that. (2) is whether or not you can partake in a social collective of likeminded people doing something similar. If your homestead is isolated, I empathize with this being unfortunate. In my own country, there are rustic collectives (think small villages) that have a great community about being self-sufficient. (3) is a personal thing. Personally, I couldn't care less; part of the appeal is refusing the 'keep up with joneses' threadmill. (4) is the core.. do you still trust your basis for making the choice, and with what you have experienced now, can you find a valid basis to continue on. (5) This "FOMO" bit is split between (2) and (3). The 3-part, you can live without. But if it really is more your (2) - your basic social needs - then of course it's not negotiable.
To sum it up, you need 'your fair share' of a social existence, but I question whether you need the joneses-part of it.
I have in my basement between 30 and 40 mechanical keyboards, and the last 4 or 5 months, I've dreaded ordering anymore, because how many keyboards does a human really need.. Are you missing the basic social community we all crave, or that they are caught up in their modern-forever-busy-for-no-reason lives..
But in the end, you are giving up a LOT! We may not NEED it, but we sure WANT it. The hard part is letting go of those attachments. But in the end we need to be realistic with ourselves. Did we give them up because we want to be free? Or are we just chaining ourselves to a new thing that we don't love.
Homesteading is inefficient, dirty, painful, unhealthy, and stressful. Most fail horribly. Even among those in history who were do or die, a lot starved or froze to death trying it. The common factor among those who succeed is planning and MONEY. Most successful farms and homesteads start with huge quantities of money that they bleed profusely in the first couple years before becoming profitable. To succeed without money means hustling for every dollar and working 16 hour days 7 days a week.
https://www.ynharari.com/book/sapiens-2/
Which describes the journey of humankind through the ages. The author has an interesting take on farming in general, in that farming led to centuries of misery for most people...and that the time before farming when we were hunter/gatherers was a far better time for individuals. When hunting/gathering, people suffered less from disease (smaller communities = less chance of catching something bad), worked fewer hours in the day, and were not at the mercy so much of climate change - starvation wasn't a thing as your small band of people travelled to places of good resources. Knowledge was key here, knowing which foods you could and couldn't eat, skills in hunting, working as a team.
I'm not sure if it's possible to be a hunter/gatherer in a modern western country? Certainly not in the UK where I live as all land is owned by someone - I suppose you could try and "live off the land" by hunting wild game, fishing, in the US?
I wonder if you’re seeing it as a rulebook. YouTube shows you 45 different projects, and so your mind says that you have to do all of them, now.
If food security is your concern, start with something manageable and move on once you’re done. If you want chickens, don’t think at all about goats or cattle. Just build the best darn chicken enclosure you can, raise some hens, and enjoy the eggs. Only once you’re satisfied you can keep that routine do you think about taking the next animal on.
Exhibit B: our temptation was to build a gigantic garden, because we could. That flopped because it’s really hard to weed that when you’ve got a toddler and a baby and a day job. This year? Small garden that we can keep up with.
What’s our agenda this year?
- Cover our cave so we can use it
- Find a place to store firewood to dry it
- Cut a bunch of it
Everything else is a nice to have. I highly doubt you’re depending on this, so don’t make yourself feel guilty just because someone on YouTube is in a season of life where they can do more.
We use the WI house for summers and holidays, and it’s 2-3 hours drive from either set of parents. We have a garden, a few gnarly old apple trees, and several small sheds for storing firewood and junk. We also spent 6 months there in 2020, to avoid the initial wave of the pandemic in DC. There are a number of organic farms nearby; we support them, but those folks work -hard- for a pittance. Over 30-40 years they will likely build wealth through farmland, but they’ll lack disposable income.
I’ve thought up all sorts of lame-brained schemes for making money off the WI property, but they’re a lot of work and a pittance compared to career advancement. Gathering walnuts and hickory nuts? Maybe a couple thousand dollars. Logging? A few thousand dollars and the pleasure of heavy equipment coming in, chopping down trees, eroding the soil, and leaving a mess of branches and brush, for a one-time gain. I could rent out my rowhouse for the summer and make just as much money with very little effort.
And even without trying to make money, there’s more than enough work to do on the grounds, and I frankly need to hire some of it out to keep from building up too much deferred maintenance. I would say, enjoy the country, invest in limiting your environmental impact (solar with grid-tie for an EV; good insulation for limiting HVAC), and don’t try to make a living from it if you don’t have to. Additionally, remember that city living, at least in dense walkable cities, is far more sustainable than country living.
Disclaimer: I am not a homesteader.
That said, my understanding is if you're going all the way with it, you're basically living as our ancestors did (maybe with some modern conveniences like better housing and tools) which, yes, required a vast amount of hard labor that would be unthinkable to modern minds. They had a couple of advantages that we don't:
1. They had no other choice, so there was no temptation to quit
2. They were raised in that environment so they were conditioned for it
3. They had a community around them that could help when things got tough (this is true of some modern homesteaders, but it sounds like you've been going solo, which frankly is probably a mistake if so)
My recommendation would be to sync up with other homesteaders, specifically in your area, if you haven't already and share war stories and see if maybe they have recommendations for you or if the stuff you found to be soul crushingly hard is just the way it is, and then you can decide whether that's worth it or not to you.
I would absolutely not recommend homesteading or owning a farm to anyone because the operation of homesteading or farming is inherently fragile. That means that all your free energy is going to be put into maintaining that fragile system. Let me give an example: Say you move out to a farm and decide to be "off grid" and for you that means you don't want to hook into a power or water. You dig a well, mount some solar panels and hook it all up your household. Now imagine you have some bad weather for a few days can't get a full recharge on your batteries you slowly loose all your power. Now because you have no power you have no water, then you decide to house potable water in a tank so that you don't lose out. That require some maintenance and plumbing knowledge Not only that you decide to buy a generator so that you have a stand by in the case of emergencies. That generator requires service that you may not know how to do and fuel that you have to go to town for, so once again you're taking more and more time and energy just to survive.
If you want to be a part of a rural community I would recommend buying a place with acreage that can still be connected to the grid; power and water preferably but power as a bare minimum. You can still have solar, you can still spread out and have a bit of freedom and you won't be as fragile. If your place has a field or farmable land I would lease it out cheaply to a local farmer. Leasing the farmable land helps the farmer, gives you a connection to the community, and helps maintain the land's current state.
My granparents were farmers, never had a tractor. When they were 50 they looked like 70. They had no other option.
You have other options.
I'm not sure what you are trying to do with Homesteading but there are all sorts of scales but it requires real hard work. Most everyone I know who can do it, inherited it and were raised in it. So that means not having to start fresh. If you don't like fixing things and getting dirty and sore then I'm not sure what you were thinking.
It sounds like you are experiencing FOMO more than anything. Like you were hoping your friends would be so pumped and wanting to come and see the farm all the time and you could show them all the cool stuff, but in reality nobody really gave a shit. Been there.
If your dream is instead a nightmare, then sell it. Presumably the property will go for roughly the same or better and you can get back to a life that doesn't make you feel regret.
> I can't help feel frustrated
In 15 years when Ghawar is solidly declining, and the US shale miracle has long since peaked, and EV market penetration is still less than 10% - when the world finally wakes up to how bad our energy situation is, you'll be happy to be providing for yourself.
> when I watch my friends in the city enjoy all of the comforts it offers
Watch their instagram feeds in 10-15 years. Relish in their food riots and daily rolling brownouts while you post your pastured pork belly and egg breakfasts and 80kWh of off-grid energy collection and storage.
It's a hard life, but it will be worth it in the end.
Sarah Taber might offer some more context on this too: https://nymag.com/intelligencer/2019/06/america-loves-the-id...
It's not the lifestyle's fault if you thought it would be fashionable. Understand this though, that same frustration and regret, folks who move from the suburbs or rural areas into the city feel the exact same thing. I'm speaking from experience. This is why theres such a visceral reaction from people when they hear, "everyone needs to live in the city because it's better". For you, sure. For lots of others, get the fuck off my property because you scared off the birds. They sound better than you. You're blocking my view of the trees too.
If you are not happy, you might want to sell. Are you living alone or with your whole family? There certainly is still a world between homestead and city.
To make a farm work isn't really a side job and it would take a lot of hands.
Thought it was going to be a utopian "intentional community", and build all the things I'd been dreaming of from watching YouTube vids. Turns out that the infrastructure you need to even get started with that is in the way. Wish I'd just gone suburban with a nice garage workshop instead. That way I wouldn't have to worry about paving a road or pumping water up to the ridge.
It seems like there are lots of interesting projects and ideas out there that can help you with "keeping plants alive", maybe some of these can lift some weight of your shoulders?
Maybe you can automate watering some vegetables by using Arduinos and electronically controlled valves and sth. like that. That could free up time which might improve your quality of life?!?
The other option is that you're comparing your life to others' lives. This usually doesn't end well, you only notice what they have that you don't.
The other possibility is that you are re-romanticizing city life. Grass is always greener. Perhaps an extended vacation of a month or two back in the city will give you fresh perspective or the certainty you need.
Farming is hard. It's generally about doing more with less which in the small scale just means grinding it out.
There are two ways to make farming profitable, write a book (or do the homesteader youtube/pateron thing) or scale.
It's really hard to scale on a homestead. You spend all day switching tasks and you can't build machines to mechanize your chores. On our farm we only grow a couple things so we cans work to scale. We have multiple acres of a single crop that produces well for us and has a high sale price. That allows us to build things like bedforming machines, harvesters, processing and storage machines.
But we're not homesteaders. Subsistence farming, even with a modern machine like a tractor is still back breaking thankless work, just like it was 100 years ago. And you're always on, protecting crops, caring for animals, doing the work and it's really inefficient. You have to really love the work if that's what you want to do. Because as a job, it's one of the worst you could pick.
Big boy farmers have scale which allows them to do things like buy crop and livestock insurance, million dollar machines, access the funds from the farm bill through various programs. And it's still brutal work but if done right it can also be pretty lucrative.
There's a reason that farming has mostly been ceded to large corporations, it's hard to do and it's hard to make money without enormous economies of scale. It's easy to dig on giant corporate farms that are cutting corners to make a buck but somewhere along the line, every acre they have is a farm that went bust or just decided they'd be better off with the one time price for the land.
And now you know why.
On the other hand, few things will beat a fresh steak on the day of butcher and a hand grown salad. But you can have that buy living in the city, growing a garden and buying a 1/4 of a cow when it goes to market.
So I don't know if this was helpful, but these are kinda generally accepted truths in the farming community that a lot of people don't really understand because so few people are farmers now. I wish you the best and hope you are able to make the right decision as decide what's next for you.
Yes, that is correct. Funny how the youtubers forgot to raise this point.
But it is obvious to people who ever tried something simple, even like raising some chickens, planting some corn, etc that to homestead is an unbelievable amount of work.
File this one into the internet fads pushed mostly by people who never tried it.
I do enjoy it when we get some good plums in, though, and for me that's enough.
Be suspicious of any hobby where there are hoards fat margin advertisers.
If I had to guess, you've never lived much in the country before; even just country living is much different and a significantly different point of reference.
I would say ditch homesteading and try your hand at farming and see where that gets you, if you want to continue. Embrace country social groups.
Comfort is the issue.
Hard times create strong men Strong men create good times Good times create weak men Weak men create hard times
I like the idea of hobby farming. Not enough to pull the trigger yet. No way I’m ever going off-grid by choice.
When the "Y2K Bug" was looming, I explained the worst-case possible scenario to Dad (an electrical engineer) regarding worldwide computer system collapse. He listened attentively, understood, and responded "then I'll throw another log on the fire and go back to my book." That's how prepared they were.
The key is embracing homesteading, to whatever degree you choose to take it, as a lifestyle. It's not a hobby. It's not a job. It's what you do, blended with and influencing everything else, 24/7.
I now live in the suburbs, with a bit of forest. Having grown up homesteading, it still influences my thinking, and I'd rather return thereto. Though enjoying modern conveniences & luxuries, everything has an undercurrent of considering "one step simpler". I lament my kids not having the same upbringing, and do try to expose them at least a bit to living off the land.
Analogy: coffee. I have about 20 coffee makers, and several coffee shops nearby. Yes it's nice to pick up a cup (black, dark) for ~$2.50 ready to go. Yes it's nice having pod machines, ~$0.50 for "insert pod, press Go". Yes, I've tried every convenience for coffee. What I normally do, with no angst/struggle regarding the work and convenience of alternatives, is roast the beans myself in small batches, hand-grind, and do a hybrid press/pour-over - nearly every time, for years, despite the time and effort, it's just what I do.
Do realize that your friends are beholden to a system which can collapse, fast and completely. It probably won't ... but the probability isn't zero, isn't trivial, and historically we're rather due for another one. You don't want to spend your life preparing for a worst that doesn't happen, but you certainly can live such that societal problems don't tear you down. You can be ready and financially/socially robust; you just have to decide where your sweet spot in life is, regardless of what 'more' others have (and pay for by 'less' elsewhere).
The hard way isn't for everyone. You either internalize it as simply what you do, regardless of what others enjoy, or you move on to what it is you do, realistically, want to do. You do you, and be realistic about circumstances.
My parents did this when I was a kid, except they moved deep into the country and not a homestead.
Their motivation was that I had the potential to become a bit of a punk in middle school, and the middle school i would go to in NYC was… not so good. It seemed more affordable and a better life than a private school or moving intra-NYC.
One of my best friends did something similar. I remember his dad saying when we were graduating high school “I built this house looking for a sanctuary, and it turned into a prison.”
I didn’t hate country life, but I never felt like i belonged either. My friends were into hunting, 4-wheelers, etc, and I was not. Most of the people who lived in my town had been there for many generations and had deep ties to the place — the farmer I worked for was like a 7th generation farmer whose deed was signed by a Dutch West India company agent of some sort.
I didn’t have that, and all things considered, I didn’t really belong to that community. I now live in a small city not too far away, but my family is part of that community, which is something my wife and I wanted.
I’d encourage you to look within and figure out what you want. It may or may not be living in the woods, and your feelings right now may not really be about the house.
It's absolutely a ton of hard work and sacrifice and people shouldn't underestimate that. There are aspects of my childhood that are really idyllic and memories that I'm really happy about. But I also remember outhouses (and a honey bucket in the winter), and a never ending series of chores for all of us (weeding, picking rocks out of the garden, harvesting plants, shovelling out stalls, getting up at 5am to go out into the pitch black freezing cold to feed the chickens and fight broody hens to get them off their eggs, chopping and stacking firewood). I've probably got an above average work ethic and ability to grind out hard work without complaining as a result, but experiencing that life also kind of pushed me in the opposite direction. I now live in a city thousands of miles away, work in tech, and while I still love hiking and camping, I absolutely loathe anything to do with gardening, landscaping or outdoor work. I have zero desire to do anything like homesteading myself (though I will admit that I occasionally think about living somewhere that I can have a pet goat. Goats are obnoxious but awesome and I miss them). Something about having to do those kinds of things for survival makes me never want to do them as a hobby.
There should be no reason why citylife is intrinsically worse, except for the noise and the pollution (car tyres create loads of microparticles).
Agriculture became big business for efficiency reasons, not due to some capitalist plot. Living in the city (if you commute by public transport) is likely more ecological than living in a rural area due to efficiency reasons.
I can share some of my own experience, as I'm a second year bee-keeper and CTO with around 16 years of experience. So I've chosen to share my life between a excellent tech job & a city apartment and a country side house (2 hour drive from my apartment).
We decided to start bee-keeping with my wife two years ago because we both felt the need to be in the nature. And bee-keeping has really been a great choice because it doesn't need your attention 24/7/365. During the ~4 winter months we have here in Estonia, I barely go there, maybe 2-3 times. So I still have the freedom to travel or pursue other hobbies if I'd like to. And during the sprint - summer - autumn, I only need to be there once a week which also isn't a fixed day, so I can play around my work schedule nicely. Sometimes I even go there during workdays and just do some remote work from there, in the middle of the woods where the only sounds you can hear is wind blowing and birds chirping. I'm obviously there a lot more than that, but this is the bare minium, this is the "I HAVE TO" and if the weather sucks or I'm busy otherwise, I don't have to go more than that.
And even though it's sometimes physically hard and tiring, it has had a enormous positive effect on my life. Doing something with your own hands that you can see and touch is a very different kind of happiness than the one my work offers me.
But all this comes with a "but". I mostly grew up on the country side, even more so, I'm actually keeping my bees at my grandmothers house (where she no longer lives due to her age) where I spent most of my summers during childhood. So I knew what was waiting for me regarding up-keeping the house & land.
What I'd suggest is to do the things that make you happy not the things that others are doing. If you don't like the physical work, don't do it. If you'd just like to enjoy nature, just get a cabin the in woods where you can go from time to time.
I'm in a lot better place with my good paying tech job and half-time bee-keeping because I also have the funds to invest into the house & land and make it more livable for the future. If I would have just quit my job and moved there full time, I'd be struggling to make the ends meet, let alone actually build houses there and develop the place for the better.
Tools, resources and materials (wood, metal, sand, gravel etc) and help from professionals all cost money. It's a lot easier to earn that money in tech than with farming. But in case the society as we know it today collapses, I still have the skills, tools and land to live off, but it hasn't yet, so no point in going full off-grid yet.
And why would you call homesteading a bandwagon? It’s a major life decision, not a new kind of yoga pants.
It’s very simple, really. Are you happy? Are likely to be happy? No? Then come home Bill Bailey.
I have a 2 acre tropical fruit orchard in North Florida with 80+ fruits that don't grow here natively, and I'd like to turn it into a side business eventually, but for now I work at a FAANG remotely and my wife is in management. You don't have to give up your life to dip your feet in. I do have Zillow fantasies about 50 acres in the tropics or 100s of rural acres but I temper that with the loss of quality of life. If I'm going to risk everything and start something of my own, it won't be on farming margins, it'll be chasing tech profits.
My great grandfather homesteaded in Montana and North Dakota, dances with wolves style. He had hundreds of acres and built wealth. This is completely different than Youtube homesteaders who build minifarms on 5-10 acres and open the equivalent of a petting zoo. The land and the work is bondage and you can't free yourself from it unless you hire help to do the work, generate more profit per unit of work than industrial farming, or find a profitable ancillary activity. Here are what I've seen be some of the success scenarios:
1. Market Gardens - Look at Curtis Stone or Jim Kovaleski who make pretty good money farming peoples yards. This route requires selling, entrepreneurship, hard work, lack of flexibility. Curtis now makes money from books/workshops/etc in addition to his farms which he has help for.
2. Agrotourism - Make money off the experience of visiting your farm. You will need to build an experience people will want to visit/pay for, and probably require products to sell, and require a steady supply of wealthy customers (example: https://www.congareeandpenn.com/agritourism).
3. Get Youtube Rich - Make supplementary money from Youtube/Patreon, use it to grow your farm and switch to one of the other activities.
4. Online Sales - Use your internet presence to sell plants, seeds, books, workshops, guides, Amazon affiliate money. Pete Kanaris of GreenDreams (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JwgfS1k7n0c) had a homestead and market garden and edible permaculture landscaping business, but has rapidly grown into a major online nursery with tons of employees.
5. Own a Nonprofit/Educational Co-op? - Teach people to farm in exchange for their labor to give you the freedom to remove yourself occasionally. Something like this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FmkgbS8RQ2k maybe.
Additionally, you need to be maximizing the value of every single inch of your land. How much land do you have, what type of environment is it, what growth zone, how are you currently making money, what're you growing, how many helpers do you have, what are your current future goals?
https://www.cargill.com/story/the-worlds-farmers-are-aging-r...
Nobody wants to be a farmer anymore because of government policies that not only attack farmers, but also spread misinformation against farming.
In the near future, maybe 3-5 years we're going to be forced to spend money as taxpayers to create farmers. The problem is... we've done this before in other industries and it made things worse. There's a 0% chance this will work for farming.
This is set in stone just from a country average. The number of boomer retirees cannot be displaced with workers. Afterall child labour laws etc. Which means we've known about this worker shortage for ~15 years now.
Germany(-4%), Russia(-5%), and South Korea(-6%) are already impacted by this worker shortage. Canada(3%) and Japan(3%) are right on the cusp of starting the problem. The USA, UK, Italy, Spain, France will be a little bit more.
If we do nothing, Germany will be -23%, Russia will be -24%, Canada -11%, South Korea -26%. USA is projected to basically just stave off worker shortage.
You might ask, 'but isnt that happening now' LOL no, not even close. What we need to do, and what Canada is doing. We are basically letting in any immigrants at all. ~400,000 per year. We have a province, PEI which has 140,000 people. We are bringing in multiple provinces worth of people every year to help stave off the worker shortage.
So you know what the homesteading movement is about? It's about creating farmers. You were manipulated.
My recommendation, figure out how to make it easy/automated. Vertical farming, aquaponics, whatever.