The reason for my suspicion that I'd be happier in the MCOL city is that I really liked the vibe in the city on the multiple occasions I visited it, and the fact that I have friends there who enjoy living there. In the HCOL city I'm living in, on the other hand, I don't have any good friends, and I'm not too enthusiastic about the vibe here either. However, the salary is great.
The company I'm working at would agree to a remote work arrangement in the MCOL city. However, the guaranteed decrease in compensation would result in a ~50% decrease in annual net savings post expenses. I don't particularly care about money at this stage of my life, but obviously higher savings allow for an earlier retirement and/or transition to a fulfilling low-paying job. There's also a possibility that being remote would negatively affect my career progression.
The obvious problem I'm facing is that the only quantifiable variable in this equation is the sum of annual net savings. I have no idea if I'd actually be happier in the MCOL city, and if so, by how much. It would be a real shame to move to the MCOL city only to find out that I don't really like living in that city as much as visiting it. That would be a very costly lesson. On the other hand, if I knew for a fact that I'd be a lot happier in the MCOL city, I think that would be worth the diff in savings to me.
That situation doesn't seem unique. It applies similarly to deciding between jobs with differences in compensation and suspected job satisfaction. I'm wondering, do any of you have experiences in approaching a problem like that? Do you just go with your gut?
If money isn’t that important to you (and money seems to be what fuels climate change), you stand to gain so much more in neural connections even if you end up not enjoying the MCOL city.
I’m in my 40s, became a father a few years ago, and I feel I grew up more in these past three years than between puberty and parenthood. All my travels, work, relationships, and other exploration through books and games (physical games great, but solo videogame-time is a mistake to learn from; healthier ways to meet my needs at the time, but I was more ignorant and suggestible) continues to bubble up as memories to learn from. I’m both grateful for all the resources I had access to and frustrated that more young people don’t have access to just a little bit more so they could expand their view of life on earth. I might have been better off with fewer inanimate resources and better guidance from other people (family, friends, and especially mentors). I got some guidance, but I’ve tended towards stubborn and know-it-all, and less likely to really listen.
All that to say keep risking, learning and growing. Your future self and others may thank you for your efforts.
If yes, this is a no-brainer.
Be warned, visits to cool places don't show the same things as living there, and some of what you're feeling is classic FOMO and grass-is-greener. That said, I left London for a Brisbane lifestyle and never regretted it, and I've seen many many cities in my long working life and I know what living in a cool HCOL city (London, Edinburgh, Amsterdam, Melbourne) long-term is like because I have.
I just prefer more average city life.
2/ I like the suggestions made by others about trying it out. Maybe take the lower compensation, move, see how you feel. Especially good option if you can come back. So basically it is a reversible decision.
3/ Could it be something else besides the city and its vibe? If you had the exact same job in the new city would your happiness level settle back to where it is in your current city?
If I was in your situation I would take some action to break out of the analysis loop. Either move with 50% pay or find a job in the other city or use my vacation to live in the other city for a bit to assess my true feelings.
Other than money, what are the good and bad parts of your current situation? What parts of the city bring you joy, and pleasant surprises from time to time? What really makes you sad or angry?
Money is a tool, the tool shouldn't drive your decisions, it's what you can/can't do with the tools that really matter.
Say you move to MCOL city and find out that you don't really like it. That would be a lesson there.