I've worked in about 20 different industries from the oilfield to construction to food service, to debt collection, to transportation, to everything in between. Nothing in tech though.
Some were possible "good" jobs, but often they're very dangerous. I was an apprentice in a trade that has the potential to earn a lot 5 years in.
It's like I work for a bit and I'll get to a point where I just want to quit and be done with it. Or there are conditions I just don't want to put up with anymore so I just walk.
I've never felt content or joy at work, which I think is normal, but I also think some other people enjoy their work.
It's also part laziness, I can be slothful without a routine.
But I just feel so lost. I almost feel too old to keep constantly moving on to something else.
Has anybody else been in this situation and come out the other side with meaningful work that they like? And they're able to support themselves?
Just feel lost, I guess. Thank you.
People forget this is the most opportunity-filled, complex economy in the history of humanity. The idea of "spend your career at corporations" is only about 100 years old as a result of the industrial rev. Forget it about it for a second. My grandfather launched a company in his youth and it was considered normal, he wasn't considered an "entrepreneur", he was just doing what many people did before today's career-at-corporations mentality became entrenched.
You already know quite a bit about a wide array of industries. Spend some months focusing on your past experiences and where there might be a place for you to break in offering a product or service.
I got a crappy entry-level job in an office, enrolled in college part-time, I was making $ 18,100/year at my full-time job, I was paying $500/month in rent, $150/month for a crappy car, and $550/per each college class. I did not qualify for student loans since I was making too much money.
So I took a part-time job, on top of my full time job, so that I could go to school at night 3 times a week.
It took me 8 years to graduate with my BS in Business (minor in CS), I went on for my MBA... to make a long story short it all paid off, I became a VP and develop a career mixed between being an executive and being an entrepreneur.
Chances are that my "recipe" won't work out for you, the common thread between my stories and other stories that I have heard is:
* work hard
* make your own mistakes (I have made a few, I didn't list them above)
* iterate fast
* when failing, pick up the pieces and continue
Not all that wanders are lost.
You could try the entrepreneurship route.
Also, read: The War on Art (by Steven Pressfield)
Those who enjoy their work are often the opposite: they live to work.
You could try tech or any number of other jobs (EMT always sounded fun to me.) But your goal should be to find something that you can tolerate, clock out, and lets you live your life.
Stop putting "fulfilling work" and "career" on a pedestal and have fun.
If not, move along, nothing to see here. (read the other comments about getting professional help, therapy, etc).
If you are, consider if you're just being complacent because you can be. Make a goal for yourself to move out within 6 months. Figure out what you need to do to live on your own, without free room and board to fall back on. And then stick to it.
Don't get me wrong, living in a rent-free or otherwise low-cost situation can be really beneficial, especially if you're paying off debt or saving for your own place. But it can also be a crutch that you lean on and prevents you from figuring out what you are going to do with your life.
Otherwise, create for yourself conditions where you can't be slothful. If you're in the US, walk one of the 3 Great Hikes. Travel through Europe (next year maybe). Join the Peace Corps. Get a volunteer job on an educational ship (e.g, the Lady Washington). These might be "dangerous", but don't underestimate the danger of being depressed at home.
Don't think that a job in tech will be any different from the others. At the end of the day it's still a job that you may like or not.
I ended up going to massage therapy school, and I worked doing that for 6 years. During that time I began learning web development, mostly as a way to pass the time on slow work days. As I got better at development I got to a point where I could realistically see it as a career.
I began to focus on frontend development because I liked that I could work without dependencies, any computer with a web browser is good enough.
Massage is physical work and eventually I got tired of it. my second daughter was on the way and I wasn't going to be able to really make any more as an MT without starting my own business, which I wasn't interested in doing. I got serious about searching for dev work and eventually found something.
As a bonus, the 4 years of self study prepared me very well, and i actually enjoy the work. You'd have to to spend 4 years studying.
I wouldn't worry about the 'laziness' bit, I think most people are like that and it sounds like you've provided for yourself.
I ended up getting a 2 year diploma in computer science (BCIT if it's relevant to you. I was happy with the program, but some folks didn't have as good of results).
For a long time, no jobs etc.. really stuck, nor did university the first time I tried. A 2 year program was good, because it didn't require as long of a time commitment to get something out of it. This one also had the option to do another 2 years (either right away or later) to finish the degree.
I'm in my second job since school now. I've never found something where I feel "joy" at work, but I'm very happy with the most recent one. Most jobs are annoying a lot of the time I think. Money and future prospects are much better than my random jobs earlier in life.
I changed cities when I went to school even though I could have found similar programs in my home town. The change of scenery was helpful I think.
I guess I have 3 main takeaways:
- I don't think you need to feel like something is a perfect fit/joy. Good enough is OK.
- Don't worry about having "wasted" years. I think life experience counts for a lot and a diverse background can be a strength.
- I never did in my late 20's or early 30's, but I think about retirement money a lot more now. People how started careers earlier and were smart with their $ have a big advantage over latercomers.
I haven't come out the other side, so I can't help you there, but you're not alone. Lots of people change careers after a few years. It's going to be hard, but I'm sure we'll figure it out.
A number of years later one of the developers I worked with had many careers before working as a programmer, he cleaned power plant reactors, lived in Africa as an aid-worked, before eventually settling down and learning to code at around 50 years old. He was a fantastic developer because of his life experience not in spite of it, and moreover a great team member because he could provide some much needed perspective.
Another tip: take stock of your mental health, and if you can afford it talk to a professional. It’s possible you have ADHD, depression, or something else, which could be holding you back. Or maybe you have none of those, but they can help you identify why you feel the way you do.
Best of luck, and be sure to come back and update us on how things are going.
No guarantees, of course, but it can at least be fulfilling in ways that ordinary mercenary work isn't.
Was a similar situation, i committed to a career and committed to it, started at the bottom in 2013, and as of 2020, made director with 2 levels of managers. Definitely some luck involved here. i hated work, became disinterested quickly - and had spend 9 years in 7 different jobs - software(2), finance (3), non-profit (1), consulting (1). There is no happy job - because it requires great pay, boss, co-workers, company and family. At that point, i decided that i was smart enough to find a new career, and wanted to move to a place that has the most number of the jobs and paid the most in the career i wanted.
i changed my goal to making enough money to retire quickly. i recognized that i am living a dopamine fueled life - going from one hit to another (in all my jobs i was given the toughest projects and i was able to pull it off) - while it can be a strength, the dependence is the problem.
From your background - 1. You are quick at learning 2. Have confidence to take risk
Going forward, identify the main goal that you really care about and focus, finding a new job/career is a by-product. Now, you also must recognize that spending years in a single career and field gets you pay growth. That new career/jobs, which is likely to be a function of the past skills / careers/ jobs, needs to be lucrative, and has great prospects. Talk to people who are already there and find out if it is worthwhile investing 10 years into. And then commit. Learn how to sell your past career as a strength - lots of jobs looking for people who want a "new challenge" or a "change".
You will do well because you have the strengths that are likely to make you successful. Along the way you are likely to make connections and make new friends.
Lots of comments asking you to join tech in some capacity - not a bad idea at all. More important is to commit. Hav known many folks who started learning development and ended up six figure base salaries.
Any shit from your past that is brewing underneath the surface?
—- Perhaps check out this thread. Might give you ideas and/or inspiration.
https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=24670746
If you are interested in tech, but want to go a more Linux/sysadmin route vs programming, then there are definitely avenues to get a foot in the tech door that don’t require a degree, or really necessarily, any certs either. You do kinda have to really want it and love it more than the average other person though.
A datacenter or hosting NOC (*nix oriented if at all possible; most NOC tech roles will be heavily Linux) Technician can be a fairly easy in, and has the potential to take you down a good career path. The great part about this particular entry level (usually) role, vs some other entry level IT role, is that you will learn a broad swath of internet/networking/linux/DNS/hosting/ security fundamentals that can easily jumpstart you into whatever specific tech path that you discover that you are most interested. After some experience and finding that out, you can then more fine-tune what your next job/role/tech path will/should be and look like.
Good luck and I wish you the very best! Stay positive and interested and it’s going to be fine!
You’re not the only one feeling it. :) stay happy
Pay is usually slightly lower than similar non-government work. On the other hand, most local and county governments have decent pension systems and good benefits, so tap into those as much as possible. And they won't ask you to do anything dangerous: civil governments are very risk-averse about their employees.
Once you have a steady job, look into broadening your education. It could be as simple as learning conversational Spanish or as complex as pursuing a Masters' degree in Computer Science. Again, most governmental jobs encourage their employees to pursue further education, in some cases going so far as to allow class and travel time to count as work hours. If you get another degree then it is then your choice whether you choose to advance within the system or go outside.
I was in a similar place to you 6 years ago, it never really clicked for me in a regular job.
I started my own small business in the vein of Max Maher/Rohan Gilkes/Sweaty Startup (moving service/house cleaning etc. ). I knew nothing about the industry I chose and worked on average about 25 hours a week. The competition is weak as the brightest/best are all (generally) in coding/tech/law/finance.
Plenty of options out there to start something low risk and cheap.
It just clicked for me, I've really enjoyed the process and I genuinely did struggle at every job I ever held.
It can be tough but the rewards are great if you are suited to running a business.
At the age of 30 I moved to another country without speaking the language and without any degree or certificate. At this point I had worked in more than 15 different jobs, sales, promotion, tourism, waiter, Quality assistent in a laboratory, logistics, office worker etc and had quit my studies as a Civil Engineer. 6 modules before my degree.
In the new country I worked for the first two years in warehouses and factories without getting any qualification. Learned as much as I could the language and after those two years I started learning in a 6 months distance learning program how to make websites. I saw for the first time in my life what is html, css, javascript etc. Before that the only thing I would do with my computer was watch movies and play games.
After 6 months I finished this course and started at another school learning more about developing. Java, SQL etc.
It took me another two years to finish and at the age of 35 I landed my first job as Backend developer.
Right now I am 37 and a junior backend developer. At the same time I grew interest about blockchain technology and now I am being part of the IOHK (Cardano) pioneer program for Plutus platform and want to learn how to make smart contracts.
I feel lost too.
I like everything and get bored by everything. On one hand I am looking for stability, on the other hand I am really bored by doing the same thing all the time.
This summer, during my vacations and while doing the IOHK program, I will decide if I want to change again and move into blockchain jobs.
If I take this step it means that at the age of 38 I will be a junior developer in smart contracts.
Will this be my final step? Will this become my passion?
Maybe. Maybe not.
Relax and do what interests you and makes you happy until it doesn't.
Then move on.
The thing is, because of supply and demand, you get paid more for work that is either undesirable or requires rare skills (or both).
Note that rare skills may be acquired through training or schooling, so if you have a rare skill you're interested in acquiring, you should go for it.
The trade you were apprenticing in sounds like it would have led to a career. It sounds like you quit, though?
If the job is not fun, try finding a hobby that is!
Do you like working with people? Teams? Working in the field? Getting dirty? Do you like working with things and machines? Troubleshooting? Teaching? Writing? Self-learning or prefer training and certification? Danger or safety? Commission or salary?
A lot of careerless folks would covet knowing as much as you probably know about yourself, given all the things you've dabbled in.
Strive to be 1% better today, at something, anything, or everything.
A journey doing this regularly will enrich your life. Sort of like teaching a child to read, and encouraging them to read. 10 minutes a day... is 3650 minutes a year. Increments add up, skills progress. If you're not great at something, become above average at everything. Grow your life.
At 23 my first child was born.
Walking away from the job is still possible, but takes so much preparation that it's often easier just to but the bullet and keep going.
"What If Money Was No Object?" /Alan Watts https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=khOaAHK7efc
I'm looking for validated B2B business ideas, e.g., companies in industry _ share problem _, this can be solved by software solution _, early adopters will be _, personal introduction can be made to _ .
Tech isn't any easier here. In fact, I would say the main marker of success is the ability to resist flipping the table. It's a constant battle and is actually a muscle that you develop.
There are 101 things that you can try but there is one thing you must do..is to keep trying.
Surely there's been fleeting moments of joy here and there (or perhaps for a period of time during a role then it's gone?). What were they?
If not, was there any joy out of work?
Which likely means you can sell your skills at really good rates.
For Boomers it might have been something like prevent WWIII, normalize race relations and the whole computing/communications revolution.
Maybe for your generation it could be
managing the East/West rebalancing to the benefit of all,
reigniting the idea of universal human rights and their meaningful enforcement,
reducing air pollution in Asia and saving millions of lives a year,
universal basic income that actually works,
eliminating global slavery,
eliminating global malnutrition,
redefining what aging means in the 21st C and beyond,
figuring out how to develop AI for the benefit of all
*Big* global ideas that are 50+ year projects.
Then find your niche in chipping away, either actively or passively, at one or more of the three. Until any problem is solved, you’ll always have a mission and a meaning and a group of like-minded folks to hang with. That counts for a whole lot in life.
If the problem isn’t some media fantasy and is actually worth your life’s dedication, the money (at least enough money) will come.
I dropped out of high school in 2005 and I worked in food service for a couple years. Then I worked at a summer job installing home security systems.
After that, I was offered a job at my family's small business running errands, shipping & receiving, and IT duties. I figured I'd work there for a couple years then transition into what I actually wanted to do-- software development.
I ended up working there 10 years and in that time I became miserable. It was never my choice to work there long term, but it was comfy and the pay was good so I stayed.
I felt babied and rarely challenged in my duties because I was the bosses son. I developed a co-dependency that left me indecisive and without boundaries. I didn't make my own choices, I would ignore whatever decisions and I had until my dad made them for me.
I quit that job thinking that any other job in the world would fix my problems. I worked at a gun holster manufacturing company, a company that stocks beer on shelves at grocery stores, an automotive parts delivery company, a packaged food plant, an airport, and two other offices doing IT work. Each time, I would flake and quit between 1 day and 3 months.
I got to the point where I was so ashamed of myself, my lack of commitment and grit, that I wanted to take my own life.
I did what was really hard at the time and I sought therapy. I had a rough time at the health clinic when I told them about my suicidal thoughts... It felt like the whole place went into lockdown because I didn't explain myself properly and they seemed to think that I was about to kill myself right then and there...
Anyway, It's been almost 2 years of weekly therapy calls, group therapy, attending two different codependency support groups, and discovering my spirituality and who I want to be.
The whole time I was skipping between jobs what I realized I was doing was I was taking whatever shit job was available, even though my desire to do that job was zero. I would smile and tell the boss that I wanted to work there, but that was just me lying to them and to myself.
What broke that cycle was lots of long walks and me getting to the point where I decided that I was going to land my dream job, or die.
I know now that that's not the healthiest way to look at the situation, but that's how it started out.
On my long walks, I thought about what I liked doing and what I would do if I didn't have to work.
I figured out that I didn't want to work. I didn't want a job, I didn't want a career. I wanted a lifestyle.
These days, I'm selling things on eBay. I mainly buy bulk exclusive Japanese goods from shipping forwarders, photograph and resell them to the US market.
It's a lot of work, I work too much, but for the first time I feel like I'm in charge of my life, and I'm doing something that I chose. I'm struggling to pay my rent every month, but I'm happy and I see opportunity for growth every day.
I'm building a website on the side, putting my other skills to good use. Something to help me and help my customers track their trading card collections and find cards that they are looking for. I like to think of what I do as, "Software development with a merchandise business model" and that really works for me. It's the exact lifestyle that I have been looking for!
ktnxbai