How to fix difficulty admitting I'm wrong?

Just do it, say "oops, turns out I was wrong about X". Apologize for inconvenience if its appropriate (if other people made plans or were mislead by it).

Here's what not to do:

* Enter into a (lengthy) explanation of why you thought you were right, because you heard it from X, or read it at Y, and go back to find and share your (wrong) sources of misinformation. ("I saw a documentary on how the moon landing was faked, and didn't realize that it was fabricated because the people in the documentary said it was true.")

* Explain that lots of people share the same (wrong) view, that it's a popular misconception or suchlike. ("Lots of people agree that the moon landing was faked, there are many books and TV programs about that.")

* Explain that, had certain other things happened differently, you would have been correct. ("When I said that COVID would never spread outside of China, I was assuming that the blockade in Wuhan was 100% effective.")

* Say that, while you were wrong in the current situation, your assertion would have been correct in various other situations. ("When I said object oriented languages don't allow multiple inheritance, I thought we were talking about Java and not C++").

If you're competent and happen to be wrong, admitting it underscores your competence. Conversely: you can't fight reality, but trying just makes you look worse.

For me, I've always respected people who admit they're wrong. It shows they know they're capable enough generally to show weakness and know it won't affect them negatively.

Basically, if admitting your mistake doesn't shed light onto anything but the fact that you made one mistake, it won't negatively affect you in a context in which you wish to be working.

If you're good at what you do, nobody who matters will not be convinced you're not by a single error. Additionally, if you have an area in which you recognize you need growth, humbly admitting that and taking steps to grow also looks amazing on you (again, to the people who matter).

I hope these points of perspective can help. It's anecdotal, but they're things I've re-discovered numerous times in my own and the professional lives of those around me whom I respect.

First, when you express an opinion, do not identify yourself with this opinion. The difficulty is exactly because people identify with their opinions.

Two, say "as far as I know" or "with the data I have now" and follow with your opinion. It makes backtracking much easier.

Third, when you express an opinion, communicate what it is based on. It makes for much more interesting conversations.

At least, those are my observations on others and myself.

There's a fabulous book called: "BEING WRONG Adventures in the Margin of Error"

It's an entire book about the cognitive experience in the moment of being wrong. It's dotted with examples of how humans hate to be wrong and how they deal (for better or worse) with their aversion to being wrong.

I don't have a problem admitting I'm wrong (I think I did when I was younger, but I've been wrong a lot since so...). However, I find that this type of deep, cerebral meditation on what it means to us to be "wrong" really helps later on when you're dealing with it in real time.

I think everyone hates to admit they were wrong about a topic they care about. There have been a lot of studies about confirmation bias.

I like to play devil's advocate. I think it's also important to acknowledge that your opinions are not you. Separating them from your identity allows them to change more easily.

https://moveyourcompanyforward.com/2020/11/03/four-ways-to-o...

First off, wow! Go you! It’s incredible you got to this point to begin with. Mad props to both you and your friend, but mostly you. You have now started to begin the creation of a low-key super power.

Second, bear in mind that in a just world you would be rewarded for the way beautiful people are rewarded for being beautiful, it’s just not that way. So consider it a matter something like personal hygiene. You do it because it’s good for you, not because you’ll get rewarded for it, necessarily.

You don’t need videos or reading material. All you need to do is acknowledge the situation, explain very briefly that you were wrong, and acknowledge how. That’s it. Gostsamo below makes a brilliant point I have also found life-saving over the years which is to express things as explicitly your opinion: “as far as I know..” etc. Not only does it help you cover your ass but it also reworks your own mind to keep your own arrogance in check.

My final thought is that I like to do the opposite. When I see people doing something that I think is genuinely good I love calling them out and being their cheerleader. I think maybe on a day-to-day basis and especially in forums like this one it is much easier to make casually cruel remarks criticizing people than to notice when they are doing something right and honor them for it.

A few suggestions:

The degree to which it's difficult to admit you're wrong is probably aligned with the manner in which you asserted whatever it was you were wrong about. If you dug in your heels, or were assertive without good reason... it might be the posture that is as hard to back down from, as much as the thing you were trying to convey.

If you assume the best of someone else's effort to communicate, and you step in incrementally into what you're trying to convey, it's easier to back off. If you've wholesale essayed a long and intricate point, you've also built the hill on which you're standing, and may topple from.

Being aware of the scope of what you're trying to convey can also make it easier to create loosely coupled assertions, each of which are more flexible than if you've tightly coupled (in language) the things you're trying to tie together.

And, of course, being aware of your ego demands. If things are rising, why? If you're hot, why? If you're speaking, have you listened? Using mindfulness to see things as they are may help you before you even do the thing you may need to admit was wrong, later.

Wow this a such a deep & expansive topic! The issue of wrong vs right and judgment is a an area that impacts all of us! I would ask you to consider that when you believe you are right about something, is about being heard? Accepted? Acknowledged? Seen, respected? This is where we take a step back & start to observe what is really happening! It always best to step into a place of detachment and ask yourself is this worth it? I actually am part of a Self-awarness programme and the specific lesson on wrong vs right saved my relationship!! I would recommend A book a little light on Spiritual Laws by Dianna cooper! If your not into the woke movement it may not be for you! and if you feel you may want more guidance and support I can send you a link of my mentor! She helps individuals overcome this kind of issue everyday! Once you begin to open up and let go! Its like a whole new world! With no regrets or shame! You can make an impact by just being you!

The best advice I can offer is to stop thinking of learning you made a mistake as an attack on you personally and start thinking of it as an opportunity to learn. Here's a true story to demonstrate that...

Years ago when I was young an older, wiser, man told me "You can learn something from everyone" after listening to me complain about someone who "didn't know shit about what I was doing but constantly pestered me with their advice".

My first reaction was to think the old guy was wrong because I'd met a lot of dumbasses by then. But after pondering that for a few days it occurred to me that if he was right I'd missed out on a lot of opportunities to learn and the only way I could prove him wrong was to look for what I could learn from everyone I met, and I hadn't been doing that.

The very next day that guy who I'd been complaining about came over again and started giving me advice while I was working and one bit of the advice he gave me that day made me a shit ton of money for a lot of years.

Realise that every single person on this planet will be wrong more often than not. And that true personal growth is enabled by learning from being wrong. Also realise that not recognising being wrong is dangerous. People have literally died because of experts refusing to admit that they are wrong.

When I make mistake at work I always send this gif to my team and boss (it's available in MS Teams!):

https://tenor.com/view/oops-my-bad-caught-eating-gif-1146550...

So try to laugh it off, and move on. Works good on team's morale too.

One simple trick™ is to admit when you're wrong or made a mistake as early as possible. Just own it, that way you own the issue and the issue doesn't own you.

Doing this is like having a super-power that makes you look both super confident and trustworthy.

This is one of the things that you should just f-word do it.

There’s literally nothing to break down.

Either you admit, or you dont.

For instance you can admit that you probably asked now for some way to avoid the problem. By moving responsibility from your shoulders to some “expert” on youtebe etc.

Practice by being wrong often. Opinions shouldn’t be fixed, if you’re intellectually flexible and always taking in new data, your opinions will always be changing. Static thinking is the knob goblin of tiny minds.

Maybe try it once and see what happens? It probably turns out to be a lot less scarier than you think

You can ask 5-why questions and get to root of this?