Otherwise, you're looking at Microtik/pfsense/opnsense.
And SQM CAKE with IP based flows enabled is the best load balancing you will find anywhere. I've used it to make 5mbit DSL links usable for a whole office. It's magic.
The automation side is lacking, but it has SSH so you can get anything done with bash scripts and elbow grease.
Only time I might not use it is a huge installation where full automation isn't optional.
Opnsense might also be an interesting alternative.
It just works. Perfectly. Spend your fiddling time on something else, there’s no need to goof with home networking in 2021.