I am in early 40's. Individual contributor in tech role. Recently I got to know, there is a huge discrepancy in the compensation. A lot of co-workers ( including juniors) are getting paid more than I do. I am not getting promoted too. My performance has been very good. I have always got high ratings. But I never discussed compensation related things with my manager. Only those who make noise are getting rewarded.
I can say, I am financially independent. Even if I get a promotion, it wont make any significant difference to my net worth. But others (many undeserving ones) making more than me hurts me. How do I handle this situation?
2. Don't focus too much on other people when you're having these conversations. Since you're performing well and have never had a compensation review, it's reasonable to just ask for a raise even without the knowledge of other people's salaries. It might be reasonable to say that you're looking for a salary that's in line with what the rest of the team is making (but I certainly wouldn't start with this). Whatever you do, don't discuss other people's deservingness and don't badmouth anyone.
3. Since you're comfortable financially, you always have the option to quit and find another job. For the same reason you might be less likely to quit because of salary. So if you don't get what you want, it really comes down to your personal priorities about what aspects of your job matter to you and no one else can really give you good advice on that.
I am in my mid 40's and find that I value companies based on how the treat employees, vendors and customers, generally in that order. If a company does the first two correct (employee's & vendors), the third is almost an absolute given. So for example, if a company doesn't update employee wages to maintain a fair market for the employee then the company is taking advantage of the employee. Startups have some leeway if someone accepts equity in place of salary, but they don't get a free pass to abuse people by paying 30%-50% of market while giving someone 1% or less of diluting equity in trade. So to me, if a company is willing to overlook someone who is executing just because they aren't raising their hand asking for more, it means to me the leadership lacks integrity. If they know someone is paid less than their peers yet produces the same or greater value, they lack integrity.
I do think you need to raise your hand and speak up, then based upon the outcome choose your path by either accepting they maybe made a mistake/there was an unintentional oversight or they lack integrity and you should expect if they do this to you they are doing it in other places. Good people do make mistakes, as long as they admit it and address it is all anyone can ask, but if you don't raise the issue you'll never know if they just screwed up or are just taking advantage of you.
2) Start talking about compensation with your manager.
3) Be aware that corporate ratings typically take compensation into account. Making less money and getting high ratings means they like the cost/benefit ratio you give them. Your coworkers who make more but are less skilled probably get worse ratings, and probably will be out the door faster if the company struggles. You will likely join that group if you push for more money. That may still be the right move, but you should be aware of the broader context of such moves.
Don’t overthink this, if the market cannot get you what you believe you are worth, then you simply are not worth that (yet). Going to your current company and asking for justice is pretty much a fools errand.
Don’t even think about asking for a raise or new position unless you validated your assumption on the open market first (a job offer with your desired role and salary).
As for being hurt, try to understand that companies are usually passive aggressive. This is what they understand. They won’t understand you getting riled up and explaining your feelings and leaving. What they will understand is, well, passive aggressiveness. Hunt for another job and just quietly leave, they’ll get it. Sadly, there are no winners in this game, but who cares - it’s not like you’re winning now right? A solid quiet fuck you is the only shred of justice you can get for yourself, and that’s the most you can ask for.
Lastly, infer intention. You are quietly being told something. Sounds like you are getting the message. Don’t make a ruckus and fuck off is the gist.
This is the problem. If you don't ask for something you probably won't get it.
Unfortunately, that's your mistake. I firmly believe that you don't get what you don't ask for. Generally speaking, managers (and I am a manager) often assume that if you aren't speaking up, you're happy with your job and they don't need to worry about you. Good managers will check in often and make sure that's actually true. Great managers will ensure that you are compensated fairly without you having to ask. But there aren't a lot of great managers out there, so...
The advice here is simple: speak up.
Pro tip: don't ask for a raise, tell them it's time for a raise. "Hey boss, I've been here for N years, my reviews are consistently good, and my level of responsibility has been increasing. It's time for a raise. Given my current salary, $Y is reasonable." Do your research and figure out what $Y should be for you. Be confident and clear. Don't say "I think" or "I believe". Just state facts. Try not to get emotional either.
Be clear about your career goals with your boss. The more explicit the better, IMO. "Hey boss, I'm currently a Senior Software Engineer. I would like to be a Principal Software Engineer by this time next year. How can we make that happen?" By stating it explicitly, you've given your boss a direction to go in and by asking for help, you've made it a team exercise. Both are very positive things and will make this all go smoother.
Do not compare yourself to anyone else, and certainly do not bring up anyone else's salary. "Fair" is not something the business believes in, but value is. If you know your own worth, you will get what you want. If they won't play ball, then it's time to look elsewhere.
In the future, you will have to learn how to promote yourself. The simplest thing to do is find a coworker that you trust and that you work well with and just ask them to say kind words about you to the boss. The more visible you are, the easier it is for the company to see value, and the biggest way to be visible is to have others speak on your behalf.
Another great way to increase visibility is to get more responsibility. Again, you don't get what you don't ask for, so be explicit. Ask for more responsibility. Any manager with any sense will wait until you demonstrate competency before you get promoted. You don't often get promoted to "Principal Engineer" unless you're already doing that work. Think of promotions as recognition for work already done, rather than permission to do that work. And the best way to make that happen is to ask for it.
Above all, stay positive. Don't say anything negative to anyone, don't bad-mouth anyone. Don't even mention the "undeserving" folks.
One final tip: forget about everyone else. The people you may think of as "undeserving" may be doing things that are simply unaware of. Managers aren't perfect, but they often have context into what the larger organization is doing that you may lack. I don't know the specifics of your company, but just keep in mind that you may not know as much as you think you do. Worst case scenario, those folks have been looking out for #1 and by all accounts have been successful at it. Now it's your turn. Look out for yourself.
Good luck!