In case you are suffering from an actual depression (or suspecting that you might do): you definitely should talk to someone qualified and not take advice from randos on the internet. And be it a helpline where you can just dump your worries to and get ideas what to do about them.
So, this out of the way: what does actually you help to keep our mood up? The cheaper, easier and more practical it is for most people, the better.
Among other things, activities that help me are:
- Going outdoors, somewhere where I do not need to be too careful, i.e. away from roads where I would need to pay attention to not being overrun, also not too muddy cart tracks where I would have to be careful not to step into puddles,... Just anywhere where I can more or less walk and look without anything requiring my attention.
- Doing sports feels very good afterwards, sometimes for days if the activity was intense enough. Running or walking might be the easiest thing to start, the latter does not even require comfortable clothes. Just go out and walk. Bodyweight exercises can also be intense and do not necessarily require any weights or machines. There are exercises that require no more than a yoga mat or a carpet to train on. Cheap and effective, imo. Check the web for details.
- Sauna (if you have access to one)
- Spending time for oneself if domestic bliss is lacking (running or walking is great as does not require one to justify why one would like to be for oneself).
- (Offline) reading is great, it really helps me focus on something and to silence other thoughts. This doesn't work with every book for me and I usually need to read into a few to find a good one.
- Anything that makes you feel in control to boost your (perceived) self-efficacy. (And be it something as simple as taking a pill of vitamine D each day because you are convinced that it might help you avoid a severe cases of Covid in case you ever catch it)
Other ideas?
At first, it was uncomfortable, but then his whole world slowed down. He started noticing things he hadn't noticed before: a particular color, a detail on a flower. It was like a different reality.
I use this idea of heading towards boredom to clear my own head. I find it incredibly helpful to sit in a dark room with no sounds and no goal for about 2 hours. After the initial discomfort (might last 20 minutes, might last an hour) my brain feels renewed and free. And the quality of my ideas goes way up.
I don't do it to be more productive though. I do it because it helps me get to a better, more attuned experience of reality. Closer to joy, peace, and acceptance, and further from always thinking about what's next.
- Go outside at least once a day, even for 10 minutes. Grab your morning coffee and just face the sun and breath and just relax for a bit. No phones allowed.
- I've halted all work on side projects during this pandemic. It's more important for me to enjoy my free-time now since the separation between home and office is not as clear with most people working from home.
- Daily conversation(s) with some friends/family. Not always realistic but contact with loved ones, even just BSing has always been helpful to me.
- Limit social media as much as possible. No offense to the people who enjoy these platforms, but I think Facebook, Twitter, Reddit are not good for humanity. Humans best interact face-to-face, even if it's over a video call.
- Limit news intake. I only look at the highlights periodically, any more than that and we're feeding that up-to-the-second news cycle that keeps us engaged and anxious.
- Read a book, any book. Phone is turned off and put away. This helps even if you're only able to do it for 30 minutes.
- Explore non-digital side projects. Have you moved home and now live with family? Is there potential to start a small garden? Something else? There's so much we can do that doesn't involve a computer or phone.
I've found that high-intensity workouts several times per week are very important for my mood. St. John's Wort also works very well for me. If I start feeling a bit down, I need to make sure I get out on the weekend and don't let myself sleep in much past 10 a.m. Breathing/mindfulness exercises also help keep my mood steady.
It's not 100% free, but you can get into the hobby with some 8x42 binos (Nikon Prostaffs are ~$100 and great, but you can go cheaper). Cameras can really eat budget - there is a $300 lumix that would be fine and even a cheaper point and shoot will work.
It's like fishing. If you are patient, you can see a lot of unexpected kinds of birds wherever you are. You can bird anywhere and have a nice time. Migration is a fascinating time where tiny birds wander by, popping in your area for a day and moving on.
Sharing a hobby like this was something new for us, and it works surprisingly well. At the beginning it felt like work and was a bit tensed, but we are now at a point where it feels just very nice to spend a bit of time on the project when we feel like it. We don't treat it as a business, so I guess that helps.
It's not something for every couple, but that worked for us during the past few months. And we started a more complex project since then.
In case someone is interested, the app is named "HabitCat" and is a simple way to track habits. Nothing very original, but as I said, we made it because we like to work on it together :)
Android: https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.noodlesoup...
iOS: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/habitcat-track-your-habits/id1...
I notice how my mood goes down quickly (specially approaching winter) if I don't exercise even if other parts of my life are ok. It doesn't matter that I have some nice goals set, good books to read, side projects, nice games... I just feel very apathetic if I don't do it.
Oh yeah and no alcohol and definitely no coffee.
- ~1 hour vigorous exercise 6 days a week
- ~45min of rucking with a 30lb pack most days
- Skype music lessons once a week to learn a new instrument
- Playing tabletop RPGs over discord 2x a week
- quitting my stressful job for a new job that's got a very different set of challenges
- hiking and tent camping whenever the weather is not rainy
- trying to embrace Hygga now that it's getting darker here
- signing up to get access to medicinal flowers that are now legal in my state that I use sparingly to keep my tolerance low
- quit drinking alcohol
These all really combined to put me into the best place I've been in a long long time. My heart goes out to the people struggling, and maybe something here can help you!
Overall learning to combat the problems with anxiety and mental state are not easy. It takes some trial and error but I think the biggest piece of advice is finding ways to break up your routine is helpful. I have gone years doing the same thing over and over with days on forgetting to live a little...it’s not healthy in the long term.
It doesn't really "make me happy", but it can remove that deep depressive feeling. Or if I'm in a good mood, it can kick-start an intensive programming session.
Humans are social beings, so living with someone is usually the better option. If one is feeling depressed, it might be due to hanging out with bad company, not pursuing your quest in life, simply lacking the stimulus you need or being too inactive. The worst is when people try to help you out of it, which makes one feel even worse. Some phases in life might be expected too, which changes over time. So having the perspective of impermanence and adventurous investigation can help explore any situation.
In many ways I'm still just a kid. Just trying to avoid being a spoiled entitled brat and act responsibly too.
- Going into nature (walking, running, hiking, etc.).
- Corollary to (1), have a form of activity, maybe throw some Yoga in the mix.
- Interpersonal relationships (it's more difficult in these times but I believe necessary).
- Mindfulness exercises (a form of meditation).
- Sometimes doing absolutely nothing is nice / contemplation.
- Maintaining a healthy diet.
- Consistent sleep schedule (and healthy habits/routine in general).
- Relaxation, which includes sauna but also breathing exercises for example (see Wim Hof breathing method / connected breathing), massages.
- Work on your passion if you have one.
- Is maybe going to be a bit controversial, note that I am not advocating for illegal drug use (should they be illegal in your area): using psychedelics (both in microdose/macrodose format) shows very promising results with regards to regulating mood (especially for those suffering with med-resistant depression) and re-connecting with one-self/others (especially with higher doses). I recommend reading "How to Change Your Mind" from Michael Pollan as an introduction, but there are also pretty good videos on Youtube.
There is something about it that kinda resets the brain and it can be quite meditative.
I can’t put my finger on it but there’s just something so comforting about them. You end up waking up so much more refreshed. I can’t recommend it enough.
1. meditation/self-reflection (could even be journaling)
2.talking with friends/family
3. Small pleasures (brewing that perfect cup and sitting somewhere quiet and enjoy it, taking the dog for a spin around the block in the evening
4. Limiting your news (e.g. just read the Sunday edition) and social media intake
5. Limit non-work/non-essential screen time
6. Go to bed and wake up at reasonable hours (don’t stay up late or sleep in a ton)
7. Eat healthy - don’t over eat, cut the processed foods and sugars, eat more green vegetables etc.
2. Meeting with Friends! although in Covid times it is much difficult. Even if you meet with a friend or family once or twice a week it can make a different.
3. Learning something new that interests you by taking online courses.
4. Sometimes just going offline and just resting and letting you mind wander can improve your mood.
- spend a whole evening going down the musical rabbit hole online, discovering new bands and songs
- play a video game (small chunks 3-4 hrs max)
- cook something from scratch, using fresh ingrediences.
- do a day hike in the mountains
- lounge on the sofa with a hot drink and a book.
- tinker with my coffee making (filter and espresso) techniques.
I love my weekdays and my job, the weekends sometimes are hard.
Take things lightly literally everything.
- Breathing/Pranayama
- Avoiding wheat and sugar
- Eating leafy greens and dry fruits
- Bible
(i'm serious)