Why are jobs gotten via referrals but online blind dating is now normal?

Commitment in online dating is much more incremental than in job hiring. With a dating app (as I understand it, I haven't used them), the process is like:

1. Get matched.

2. Chat online back and forth.

3. Go on a date.

4. If that works well, maybe another, etc.

At any point, either party can call it off or just ghost. There are many easy exit points, so it makes sense for the top of the funnel to be as wide as possible in the hopes that a candidate makes it all the way through. There is little harm in taking at least the first step or two with many participants.

With hiring, interviewing uses valuable employee time. Once an offer is extended and someone is hired the company is effectively fully committed to them. The employee is even more committed since they likely quit their previous job.

I don't think what you're saying is 100% true. When I was looking for a gf I asked my friends if they knew someone who I might like. I also tried online dating. Online dating ended up working eventually after a lot of trial and error but it would have but a lot easier if a friend could have given me an introduction to a validated person. Would a person a friend introduced be the optimal person for me? Maybe not, but it's someone I likely could have been with quickly who would probably have been at least pretty good. Online dating meanwhile is an awful slog even if it sometimes produces a better person at the end. The exact same thing applies with hiring, except the stakes are higher. I can date someone for a month or two, decide I don't like them, and move on. You can't do that with hiring.

My friends don’t know my dating criteria. Jobs can be well defined, but personal preferences are more difficult to express. Nuances matter.

The real problem is not with online dating but with fake accounts. I used to write well crafted letters that resulted in interesting dates. Now, I have no easy way of verifying I am not writing to a bot.

I think most people would prefer having a "referral" for dates (I know I would at least).

The cost of bad behavior is much higher if there's a third party involved (i.e. you're not just burning with me but also the person who introduced us).

Online dating on the other hand can be a cess pool of poor manners, since there's no social penalty for ghosting your date or misbehaving.

The reason that online dating has been on the rise is because it's easy, convenient, and turns potential suitors into a commodity.

Whow whoa, hold on. Since when is Tinder a "blind date"? If anything, it's the exact opposite of a blind date.

This is messed up but I feel like I get jobs and dates based on being white and non threatening, I’m not particularly great professionally or personally in my opinion

This might cause flamewar, but I think job referrals work because there is clear monetary incentive, whereas, in the case of dating there is no such thing or its equivalent in terms of relationships for the referrer.

This is a biased assessment. In some cultures, mutual connection is still the goto for meeting and subsequently dating new people.

Because online dating is based on looks (initially at least) and jobs candidates are hired based on skill and personality. Looks are easy to judge in a few seconds, skills and personality are not.

Companies are slow-moving. They legally can - but structurally cannot - decide one day that they're not that into you and move to a new state. If they bring in a bad employee, they have to first build up proof that they messed up, explain any mistakes to their customers, and ease other employees' concerns. If you've seen someone hired and fired from a white-collar job, the manager goes a lot of work trying to keep them on.

You might be tempted to compare this to relationships and divorce, but now you're making a totally different comparison. Going on a blind date, introducing them to your family, and marrying someone without any third-party verification are totally different things!

I think it might actually be the opposite.

Anecdata:

- <50% of the people who joined my team recently were referrals.

- >50% of my friends in "serious" relationships met offline.

I'm not sure what your experience has been, but in my experience friends set each other up with dates all the time. Tinder even tells you if you have mutual friends with someone.

Maybe because people are too busy with social media to have actual friends nowadays? :3

Follow the money. The other way of finding candidates — paying professional sourcers who do it for a living — costs an enormous amount of money, often 25% of the first year salary.

Paying your employees $5k or even $25k (in sfba) is a lot cheaper.

It's all about looks and even more so these days!

Side rant...why on okcupid do I get 40 likes ..send messages to ten or 15 of them and no response. Online dating sucks! Many of those likes are probably fake created by OkCupid.

Supply and demand. Good jobs get thousands of applicants, attractive people get swamped with messages. The more balanced the two sides, the better an online marketplace will be.

For jobs there's a competitive selection process, so referrals from people who passed the competitive screening are likely to be in a top percentile.

With friend networks, most people don't have a competitive selection process - you're friends because you went to school together, lived in same area, etc.. The referral for dating isn't as likely to be in a top percentile, so it makes sense to go and cast a wider net.

I think they're both for the reason that the less effort required the better. The faster you can hire someone that can do a job reasonably well the better off the company will be. Likewise in dating, you'll likely be much more successful if you don't have to put as much effort into finding dates/hookups.

I really don't think either situation is as binary as you make it. My latest company hired me through a recruiter and my current long term gf I met in lerson first. Have also had a shorter term thing over Tinder, which also went well. Either way, success is an organic thing after the first steps.

Maybe they are not so different.

Triplebyte is like Tinder, but for jobs/hiring no?

You fill up a profile, you can browse companies and indicate when one is a potential match for you (It's the same for companies, I guess).

If there is a match then you can contact each other.

shrug

This is my take:

-It would limit your possible mates based on your circle of friends.

-Some people want to keep their dating life quiet as involving others can sometimes stress out the situation.

-If things don't work out there is less risk of gossip within your group.

  blind dating via dating apps like Tinder

Tinder is the opposite of blind dating. Blind dating means that you've never seen your date's image beforehand.

The cost of a bad date is low. The cost of a bad hire is high.

A few obvious differences 1. Companies don’t hire based on how hot you are 2. Companies can’t ghost you at a moments notice once they have committed

I believe dating via referral is possible, it is more expensive.

It needs cultural support (parents) or more money to pay for a matchmaker.

People don't value emotional cost proportional to the damage it can cause; they usually do for money

online blind dating is not normal, if you can see pictures of the person and interact with them before the date I don't really see what is blind about it

The equivalent of online dating in hiring is contracting?

People are more personally isolated and priorities for relationships have changed.

You don’t necessarily want to hook up with a friend of a friend.