How do I learn a spoken language?

Question

I always see posts about being multilingual and I feel bad. I'm able to stick with Babble/Duolingo for several months but I never have the interaction required to build the lasting connections with speaking the language. However, I pick up programming languages like drinking water and I chalk that up to having a tangible use case for them. In the contrived setting of modern language learning platforms it just doesn't have the same kind of staying power for me because I never wind up actually using the language for something real. This leaves me with a second grade German and French and Spanish. I have one french friend for instance but monopolizing her time in conversation doesn't seem optimal or even desirable from either of our standpoints. For people who were able to overcome this issue what platforms,techniques,groups etc did you engage that you felt gave you a proper experience with using the language and let you overcome the issue that the limited platforms / lack of real usage?

yesenadam · Accepted Answer

About 10 years ago I accidentally made some spanish-only-speaking friends online, then had to learn spanish! It takes so much work, you can really only last the distance if you have to speak it, something I've heard others say. I've since had many thousands of conversations in spanish with friends in many countries, which has been amazing. Constant chatting every day; most of my communication every day was in spanish for years.
Also I joined 2 free language-exchange sites (This was 5-10 years ago, I think those sites are different now, but I'm sure others have taken their place) - where they matched me with spanish-speakers who wanted to learn english, we taught each other. One when I'd just started, another about 5 years later. Both people became very dear friends, and we chatted a lot, about everything, not just our languages. I wouldn't try that for a second with my other online spanish-speaking friends–being matched with people who want to teach and learn the right language is invaluable. Both times I met the perfect teacher within a few days of being on the site, and so left. Also I have my computer set to spanish (so the internet thinks I'm a spanish speaker!), watch lots of spanish-language movies/tv series.. and in the early years especially I studied spanish grammar a lot.
I feel I've learnt as much about english as about spanish! (and latin, french etc) Good luck!
(p.s. One unfortunate side-effect has been that using capital letters for languages/nationalities now seems super-weird to me)

dddddaviddddd · Answer

I've found Benny Lewis's book 'Fluent in 3 months' helpful. My main takeaway was that practice directed to the intended skill is most effective. With language learning it's usually speaking, hence this should be prioritized in your learning. Likewise, speaking with people is an effective motivation because it motivates learning as much as performance. I'm a native English speaker, have studied French for a few years and now studying at a French-language university.

antoineMoPa · Answer

My techniques: Listen to movies in the languages you are learning. Listen to foreign radio while you work. Examples:
101.ru
deutschland.fm
radio-italiane.it/radio-italia
Listen to a lot of content even if you don't understand. Don't try to pay attention all the time. Your brain will work in the background. Platforms can help with vocabulary and grammar, but without real content to listen, you don't get the full experience (listening skills, cultural contact, fluidity, etc.).

omosubi · Answer

I'm learning Spanish now and listening to a lot of radio and podcasts has helped my understanding of it.
Translating easier children's books is really helpful, especially if you can find a book in both English and the target language.
Also, anki decks that have full phrases/sentences are really helpful.
I want to try baselang.com for a month or two to improve my conversational skills. It's only for Spanish, but I wonder if there are equivalent services for other languages (unlimited conversation sessions for a flat fee per month). I haven't tried this yet though so I can't say how effective it is.
Italki is a good place to find people to talk to as well. Basically everyone there wants to learn English so that's nice.